Fear

Fear protects our survival. It alerts us when we are at risk. But what if danger was what we learnt that home means? What if a home without danger is just a house, and what if we seek danger just to feel at home? What if, in that environment, escaping feels the most dangerous thing to do? The fear, for a moment, long enough, of the nothingness that awaits outside the home. Despite the void feeding the self, the longer one stays inside.

It takes one decision and many attempts to own that fear – and leave. One choice later, the monster disappears. There was no danger, the fear was nothing but a fear of doing what we thought we could not do. Seldom is more than that. It was the survival instinct: we thought we would not survive. Better the devil you know, they say.

It is not, though. Freedom from a life-known devil is the biggest justice one can make to one’s self. Calm, clarity and wholeness are fair pursuits to get in exchange. Being back to who one is without the hindrance of irrational fears, anxiety, and unnecessary tension is like winning the lottery at life. One can start living instead of merely surviving. And, ah, that feeling of being alive, the infinite options to try and fail, try and succeed, try and try again. The endless possibilities to challenge, to be irreverent, to feel, to think; to learn; to be – can beauty be described in any better way?

If it’s in your mind, and you are afraid that you may not be able to do it, do it anyway. Fear protects our survival, nothing more than that; and more likely, we will survive. Until we don’t. But before that happens, do it. Fear does not exist on the other side of that choice, although you may not feel that yet. Just try and see what happens. And then try again.

One fear at a time, one scratches life’s cards, until one hopefully arrives at Ithaca, free, naked and brave.