This week, I sang!
Following Cameron’s The Artist’s Way, this week was about recovering a sense of identity. Every day, I write in my journal – religiously. It is not always the first thing I do in the morning, though I try to make it so. Sometimes, the cats are the first to claim priority. Or Gianni. Or the rush to go to the loo. Or, well, being in another country for the weekend to attend a concert of my favourite band.
Last week, on Monday, I joined a group singing course, giving me the chance to have a fixed time in the week to sing. In the past, I took individual singing lessons, and this time I wanted to try a group setting to get over my shame of singing in front of others. I truly enjoyed it. Joining the others in a song feels so powerful and glorious; it is addictive. A choir may be next?
Now that the Christmas holidays finished, I am back into my cyber bootcamp. If time flew by before, now it’s running at light speed. I struggled to get all the reflective activities done, and I am not sure I should count driving Huesito to the vet and back whilst listening to music as an ‘artist’s date’.
But.
The weekend was full of the bits I love in my life: a trip to Bilbao, sightseeing with Gianni, getting lots of books, and seeing Doctor Deseo at the Arriaga Theatre. It was just a wonderful way to welcome my 33 years of age. I sang my lungs out. After the concert, I hinted at Gianni whether we could go and wait for Doctor Deseo to leave the theatre and see if we could say hi to them.
I was 20 the first time I saw Doctor Deseo in Madrid. I had first heard of them when I was 18, thanks to my first boyfriend. Deseo’s singer, Francis, is this eccentric, dark, yet charming and passionate man. He sings of love, pain and hope, and his voice stirs something in me that I adore with fervour. I cannot quite explain the sexuality he exudes; yet, he’s full of it and he fills the entire theatre with it. I felt it 13 years ago and I felt it on Saturday. Back then, I was on my own in Madrid and made friends with the couple next to me at the concert. At some point, they told me they were going to try and see if they could meet the band after the concert. I, of course, joined them, and after an hour in the cold, there they were.
So, this second time, it felt nearly like a tradition to go to the backstage and wait for them. Some rain later, we were chatting with Doctor Deseo and toasting with bubbly – it so happened that one of their technicians was also celebrating their birthday. And I didn’t just get my picture with Francis again but also a rose!
Gianni, asking me if I hadn’t thought about making similar music to Doctor Deseo, seeing how I have not quite shown quite an idolatry for other music – bar Mercedes Sosa’s – got me thinking about the things I had got right when I was 18, or more especially, that time between 15 and 18. Back then, I liked reading, writing and listening to music – and singing. A decade later, I am back to basics: rediscovering the things I used to do and remembering how much I loved doing them.
So, maybe, maybe my voice one day will create goosebumps for others just like Francis’ voice does to my skin.
G. Maria Bencich-Grigore 